So my life as of today has been quite the adventure, so to say. While my divorce has officially been lengthened to a four year venture, we are finally closing in on a finalization date. It is very relieving to finally be at the end of it. While it truly only lasted 10 months, I'm glad that at least I had the chance to visit the west coast, live in San Diego for a while, make wonderful friends with a few people and even have the chance to visit Mexico and Alaska. Without ever having this marriage I'm not sure I would have had those opportunities. Sadly, this marriage was one of my many mistakes I've made as an adult. I cared for my husband, and at one point even loved him. However, we were in no way made for each other. Sadly, it was a farce. As I said though, without it, I probably never would have had those fun times.
This reminds me of something I heard on a movie once, "We only accept the love that we think we deserve." I can't tell you how many times I settled in relationships. I simply accepted them because the one I had always wanted had never wanted me, or so I thought, but that's a different story altogether. I knew going into some of my previous relationships that they would never last, but I also knew that if I didn't give it a shot I would never know for sure. I hated feeling alone and even though I wasn't truly happy with them, maybe I could do my best and maybe it would be okay.
It may have taken me 10 + years to figure this out, but never, NEVER allow yourself to settle. Never accept a situation with a significant other that is not what you truly want. This is probably the only time I believe that we have to be selfish to be happy. I'm not saying be selfish and controlling over you significant other, but know what you want out of a partner. Know where you need your partner to be in their life, know the level of commitment you are looking for, know what qualities in a person you find most important, know what you want and DON'T SETTLE.
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